Everything that is SAID & LEFT UNSAID...

This is the phrase that I often use to explain how much social communication encompasses. I use the term social communication intentionally instead of social skills. I think social skills at times becomes limited to being able to say hi/bye, take turns, look at someone when directed, and maintain a topic for multiple exchanges. All of these skills are important, but social communication isn't just about a collection of learned skills. It's about not only what marker of communication is used, but in what context and for what purpose. To say it simply--it's not simple.

Social Communication Milestones with Ages 
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One of the foundational layers of social communication is COMMUNICATIVE MEANS & COMMUNICATIVE INTENT.

​Communicative Intent: Why we communicate (function)
Communicative Means: How we communicate (form)

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EXAMPLES OF COMMUNICATIVE INTENT

​showing
​protest 
requesting reoccurrence
requesting an object
requesting an action
directing someone to look
initiate a conversation
maintain a conversation
secure someone's attention
direct someone's actions
terminate an action
​terminate an interaction​

EXAMPLES OF COMMUNICATIVE MEANS

eye gaze
point 
vocalization
word
phrase 
sentence 
walking away
push away gesture 
wave

At the core, many children with social communication deficits have unconventional or limited communicative means for the communicative intent they desire to communicate. For example a child who:

• uses a physical means to initiate a social interaction with a peer
• comments about their actions at center time without directing it with eye gaze to the listener
• Uses a movie quote to initiate a conversation with a peer
• Does not respond to a comment even when they desire to maintain a social interaction
• throws a object to protest
• pushes a peer to negotiate space

The absolute BEST time to model/teach communication is when the child shows the communicative intent for that communication (means). For example, when a child grunts to secure a mom's attention, that is the time to model calling, "mommy" while the mom is not looking. Once the child repeats "mommy", then the mom turns and comments, "I heard you say my name! I'm looking at you!". This reinforces the appropriate communicative means (calling name with one word label) with the communicative intent (securing attention).

When we look at the communicative intent, we can shape the means that is used (even unconventional). In that way, we are addressing the function instead of simply redirecting.